Who’s Better?

I’ve always had a hard time with comparisons. It’s so easy for me to look at the lives of others and think they have it better than I do. They’re prettier, smarter, more successful, more likable, wealthier, just better. There have been times in my life where I have had to get off social media because I was so overcome by comparison that I couldn’t appreciate my own life. 

The internet and social media, in particular, have honestly made comparison easier than ever. You can now compare your everyday, unfiltered life to someone else’s highlight reel. It’s not healthy. It’s not accurate. In fact, it’s downright dangerous. 

The Comparison Game Is Not New

Even Jesus’ disciples fell prey to the comparison game. We know that at one point, they argued over which of them was the greatest (Mark 9:34). Even after they had witnessed Jesus’ death and resurrection, they were still caught up in the comparison game.

In John 21, Jesus appears to his disciples after his resurrection for the third time. They’re out fishing (unsuccessfully) and Jesus gives them some advice from the shore. They follow it and pull in a huge catch of fish. Then Jesus invites them to join him for breakfast. While they’re eating breakfast, he restores Peter and shows him that he has been forgiven for denying him during his trial. 

Then Jesus tells Peter some rather unpleasant things about what will happen in Peter’s life. When Peter is older, he’s going to be taken somewhere he doesn’t want to go, by force. The writer of John tells us that Jesus was telling him about his death and how he would die in a way that would glorify God. You would think Peter would be focusing on what this message means for his life, but no. Instead, Peter wants to know what’s going to happen to another one of the disciples, John, who wrote the book. 

Jesus rebukes Peter and says, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” Jesus warns Peter to mind his own business. Jesus could supernaturally keep this person alive forever that shouldn’t affect Peter’s life in any way. He should focus on his own life and not worry about what God is doing in the life of this other disciple. 

It’s comforting to me to know that Peter and I share a similar struggle, and yet God was still able to use Peter. I hope that’s comforting to you too. Other than taking comfort that we aren’t alone in our struggles, we can learn a few things from this passage. 

Our God is a God who restores.

Jesus takes the time in John 21 to restore Peter. They’re able to clear the air about that whole denial thing, and they do it in front of the other apostles. Peter isn’t just restored in his own soul. He’s restored in the eyes of his fellow apostles as well. 

God still does this kind of work today. It doesn’t matter what our sin is, God can restore us and he can do it in such a way that it’s public. That’s not always comfortable. I’m guessing Peter felt a little awkward and embarrassed by this whole thing, but it’s for the best. Don’t be afraid to share your struggles and share with others how God is working to restore you. It’s encouraging for those around you (because who doesn’t struggle?) and it shows that God is working in your life, even if it can be awkward or messy. 

Keep your eyes on your own road.

Jesus warns Peter not to worry about what was in store for his fellow disciple. He gives us the same warning today. We shouldn’t compare our lives, our marriages, or parenting styles, or our spiritual journey with others. There is no one right way to live out our lives. We’ve all been given different circumstances, talents, and gifts. Our lives are never going to look identical, so it’s unfair to compare them. 

Yes, you can look to others for inspiration. We can learn from one another and help each other avoid mistakes and pitfalls. However, we should always recognize that God has a unique path for each of us. Our lives are never going to directly follow or correlate to anyone else’s. Inspiration is a gift. Comparison is a trap. 

God’s plans for all of us are different but good.

Peter and John had very different life stories. Traditional tells us that Peter was crucified upside down, therefore fulfilling what Jesus said to him in John 21. In contrast, John lived a good long life and died of old age after he wrote his gospel and several letters. Each man lived a good life. They did exactly what God wanted them to do, but their lives looked and ended very differently. 

Different doesn’t always mean better or worse. Two very different lives can both be good. We should not compare if someone’s life is “easier” or “harder” than someone else. We don’t have “better” or “worse” callings. They’re simply different. Be thankful for the life that God has given you. Soak in the joys. Cry out to Him in the sorrows. The life that you have been given is the life you were meant to live. Don’t compare it to anyone else’s. 

Photo by Tim Gouw on Unsplash